8 Embarrassing Hollywood Tech Cliches
"Who ate my screws?!"
Between screwing with Nigerian spammers and trying to retire before 30, I watch an unhealthy amount of movies and TV. And much to my wife’s regret, I am unbiasedly one of those “that-will-never-happen-in-real-life” people.
It’s funny. Because while I can suspend infinite disbelief watching Bruce Willis destroy a helicopter with a shoe lace (not even his own), what get to me are the little things. Coffee cups, for example. Actors love to use overly expressive arm gestures while supposedly holding a full, boiling hot mocha latte. Now, I’m no fluids engineer, but I’m so paranoid about spills it takes me two minutes to walk to the coffee machine and 10 minutes to get back to my desk. Ladies, why wasn’t Rory Gilmore scolded horribly by her mother every week?
I can usually overlook most of these flaws, but what really get to me are tech errors. Now you’re on my turf, Hollywood. I understand that the goal is entertainment, but come on. You’re embarrassing yourself.
Interviewing Tips From Your Future Boss
photo: nbc
‘PaleoSprockets’ is a guest contributor and has been an electrical engineer for over 40 years.
Last year, my team and I interviewed a candidate for a technician position. He didn’t do so well on the technical interviews administered by some Spock-like engineers of mine. This surprised me since I really liked him; he had great experience, and he came with glowing recommendations. But in the end, we ended up not hiring him because of the technical interviews.
A few days after the interview, he did something that impressed the hell out of me and ultimately landed him the job — he thanked me for the interview and asked me if I would tell him how he could do better next time. He said he was not used to rejection and wanted to improve his interviewing technique.
After some deep thought, I pointed out to him something that is important: if you put something on your resume, you should be ready to talk at length about it. His resume included some very specific technical projects that he was unable to explain and that bothered the interviewers.
Technical Interview Questions
So you’re nearing the end of what is probably the most stressful pop-quiz of your life: the technical interview. But you’re doing great though! You knew what a quaternion was and you totally nailed that pinned-beam question — pun intended!
And then suddenly, a lob. The interviewer leans forward and takes a short sip from his Dilbert mug. “Tell me, if the time is 3:15, what is the angle between the hands on the clock?”
Is this a joke, you think. This is an engineering position, isn’t it? Is he checking to see if I’m awake? You quickly visualize the clock.
“Zero”, you respond confidently. The interviewer grins. “Hmmm… good.” An awkward silence fills the room. Somewhere off in the distance, a dog barks.
6 Future Projects in Google’s Arsenal
It was the year 2000, the early days of the Internets, and Google had easily rose above AskJeeves and AltaVista to become the adolescent nerd’s tool of choice for finding time-wasting Flash games and crappy Flash videos. As the adults took notice, Google’s publicly traded stock rose along with its popularity. And the web was happy for a brief moment. We were years away from inane youTube comments and inbox flooding lolcats. And then in 2002, Google got fancy. First came Google Labs, then Froogle. Then it was blogging, social networking, text messaging, mapping, and image searching. Suddenly Google became scary — like a tinted white van full of puppies and candy.
Fringineering: The Rubik’s Cube Trap
photo: exploratorium.edu
Fact: People who can solve a Rubik’s Cube are pompous, smug asses. I know this. I was one.
It was December of 2006 and I had just seen “The Pursuit of Happyness”. As the end of college approached, I had been unsuccessfully looking for a job. So in preparation, I immediately purchased a Rubik’s Cube and, á la Will Smith, learned to solve it within a 10-block cab ride. Proud, I expected some sort of reward for this amazing logical feat. I received no such reward.
Determined to receive the notoriety I assumed was advertised on the box, I demonstrated my Rubixal powers to anyone who would lend me 45 to 210 seconds. Still, nothing.
It was then I realized the insignificance of my accomplishment. Like sword-swallowing or landing on the moon, the world had become desensitized to the Rubik’s Cube.
“Celebrity Baby House” – Wed 8/7c PM on FOX
New spammer! It has been almost two years since the Mr. James adventure, and I had not received one direct scam email. Early this summer however, I stumbled upon this Craigslist post.
$1200 / 5br – 5 beds, 4.5 baths, 3,248 sq ft (Manhattan Beach CA)
This ad seemed (rightfully) too good to be true; a 2 bed apartment in Manhattan Beach can easily run for twice that amount. But I couldn’t resist the bait. Apparently my two year Nigerian scammer ban had been lifted…
Fractionated Spacecraft
image: darpa.mil
Remember how interchangeable parts revolutionized manufacturing in the early 20th century? I do. Also, Eli Whitney invented the cotton gin and Lincoln was shot in a log cabin.
Well, since the 1980s the world’s smartest and handsomest scientists have been pushing to implement such an idea onto our aging satellite and spacecraft systems.
Fractionated spacecraft are all the buzz in the aerospace industry [pdf]. To oversimplify the concept for the purpose of entertainment in an otherwise dry blog entry, fractionated spacecraft are like Ocean’s 11. Instead of sending one big monolithic satellite to do the job, you send a bunch of smaller specialized components, like Matt Damon and an Asian guy who does acrobatics.
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